Going silent

Sometimes I go silent

because I start believing my voice does not matter

the presence or absence of my words does not affect you

it is an act of pride, an act of spite

but what I don’t realize is that whom I am punishing the most is myself

for my words remain trapped in my throat and they jam my heart

and nothing can work anymore as it should in my mind

and the sadness I want you to feel, I choke with

and I become so miserable I want to die to end my suffering

 

How could I doubt of how my words cloak you in love

how you await them hungrily even when you do not read them

and how by letting this love flow toward you

you too cloak me with the love of your silent, invisible words